NASA Image Analyst Confirms Bush Wore Wire During Debate

Dr. Robert M. Nelson, a senior research scientist for NASA and Caltech's Jet Propulsion Laborator, declares that he is "willing to stake my scientific reputation to the statement that Bush was wearing something under his jacket during the debate" that caused the notorious bulge. Obviously, Bush's cheating during the debates is a minor offense compared to, say, lying about the weapons of mass destruction in Iraq. Nonetheless, this incident deserves attention, as it is indicative of Bush's character, demonstrating that our pampered president, who was born with a silver spoon in his mouth, believes that he doesn't have to play by the rules by which most people are expected to abide. Had John Kerry or Bill Clinton worn a wire during one of their presidential debates, you can be damn sure the Republicans would have been calling for their heads.